My son is 10.
He has high functioning Autism and if you didn’t know that about him, you’d just think he’s one of those gaming addicted kids with no social manners and bad parenting. We have reached a place that we need help; me and him. It has taken me longer than it should have to reach this point. Denial? Maybe.
I have never treated, loved or parented our children any differently due to their Autism. In fact, before I had my own children, I helped raise others. So when my own children came along, I didn’t change my perception of how to raise them despite their diagnosis. Maybe I should have. Hindsight is 20/20.
Somewhere along the years, I should have turned left instead of right. But at this point I am not about the mom guilt. I am about getting us help. At the same time, I just want to understand him better.
Over the years I learned a lot of things about my kids with Autism.
Something everyone needs to understand first of all is when you have met one child with Autism is that you have met only one child with Autism. No two are alike. Furthermore, kids with Autism have a hard time understanding intangible things; like emotions, phrases, sarcasm, and even colors. In order to try and understand my kids better I recently asked them how do they feel love. What do I do that makes them feel loved?
The answers, even though expected, still surprised me.
6 year old- “when you hug us and tell us you love us”
9 year old- “when you tell us you love us”
10 year old- “when you buy us things”
I was honestly mad about his materialistic answer. I have not raised my children to be spoiled or equate objects to love. But yet, my son sees that a gift is love. Then it dawned on me why.
Due to the fact kids with Autism have a hard time understanding things they can’t touch, maybe, just maybe, my son isn’t as spoiled rotten as I think. Maybe he is associating gifts with love because a gift is something he can hold and touch. That’s my theory anyway. Regardless if my theory is right; he needs mental help.
I face the reality there are still people in this world, intelligent people, who think there is no such thing as mental issues. Furthermore, it is hard to say some children need mental help and even harder for some to except it.
Kids are suppose to be happy and full of laughter with eyes that see unpredjudice futures.
Adult’s seem to question what a child could have possibly gone through to require such help. But does that really matter?My children need help I can not provide for them. I am here to raise and protect them. Regardless of societies views, no one should be ashamed for getting the help they need.