Don’t Be A Poser

Glasses are not a accessory.

They are a necessity.

I get so tired of people asking me why I choose to wear glasses. Err, what? I choose to wear them so I can see dummy. I mean what type of question is that? I want to ask them- why do you choose to breath? Geeze, stupidity. People asking me about my glasses just implies people still think glasses are unattractive. However, because we are grooming people to be respective of others, now we are just being passive agressive and I can’t stand people being passive agressive! Just say what you mean- You think glasses are ugly.

Then I see people walking around with glasses and I think “those frames are so cute”. I’m brave (and nosey) and stop them to ask where they got them. Their reply makes me want to slap-a-hoe because they are fake. Their glasses are fake! Exsqueeze me? Why would you choose to wear glasses? Are you mocking us glasses wearing people. Yes, yes you are; just so you know. When you wear fake “cute” frames (because they aren’t glasses) you are mocking me! Nevertheless, companies are encouraging the mocking by providing amo with selling fake frames. But I guess they aren’t fake frames, because the frames are actually real. Ya, know?

Anywho, let’s talk about where all this hatred comes from. It comes from years of having no choice (don’t tell me “you can get contacts”; that’s not an option biatch!) of wearing glasses. Here are just a few really crappy reason’s why wearing glasses completely sucks and why I hate when you mock me by wearing fake glasses.

  1. It begins with the struggles of walking up hill to school both ways in the snow with no shoes in the winter. No, really, your glasses steam up from you struggling to get up that hill because your body temperature is warmer than the air outside, and then you can’t see because your glasses are fogged so then you trip and roll down the hill and then you lose your glasses in the snow and you can’t see so you start crying while you are on your hands and knees looking for them…..whew, that was a mouth full. So yea, your glasses steaming up so you can’t see “kinda” sucks, especially while driving, because like, you can’t see!
  2. Let’s take a shower. But wait, how the hell are you supposed to see in the shower? You don’t wear your glasses in there. Why? BECAUSE THEY FOG UP! And remember, then you can’t see! So you fumble around grabbing at fuzzy blurry shapes in hope it is the object we are really after. However, after you grab what you think is shampoo, you realize it’s not foaming. Shampoo is suppose to foam. Why is this not foaming?! Crap. So you scream for your husband and ask him to read the bottle. He tells you it is a shampoo bottle, but then tells you it’s actually baby oil inside because he accidently broke that bottle and the shampoo bottle was empty so he just poured it in. Um, thanks for the heads up (no pun intended).
  3. Screw it. You move on in your shower routine and need to “trim the hedges”. Trying to shave your legs, or anything else, is like planning involuntary manslaughter. I.E. You don’t plan and cutting yourself a million times over, yet you can’t see because you can’t wear your glasses in the shower because they fog up. Remember then you can’t see! So now your legs, and anything else, look like a murder scene as the blood runs down your body with the water and soap. Soap in open wounds burns. It burns! Oh, the pain and agony your shower is now bringing you. So you hurry the hell up and get out as fast of possible. Who needs to actually wash their body anyways. At this point you just hope the baby oil/shampoo/shaving cream combo has done enough cleaning.
  4. So what happens when you sleep? Of course you don’t need your glasses. So you throw those bad boys on your right stand (if you practice good glasses care and good aim). But wait, don’t put the lens side down, because then you can scratch the lens and then you can’t see! Put those sexy specks in a case.
  5. It’s been a long day walking and crawling in the snow. Then taking a blind shower slicing up your legs like Edward Scissorhands and as you settle into bed with your sexy bae glasses in their case, you realize you forgot to pee. However, you feel confident you can do this- walk to the bathroom with no glasses on…in the dark. HaHaHaHaHaHa! NO! That aint gonna happen. Instead, you trip, fall and stub every protruding body part. You awake the next morning wondering what fight club you were in last night.

So, let’s recap. I (and other glasses wearing people) wear glasses so we can see. Seeing is good. Seeing is fun. Seeing is actually required to do a lot of things (although I’m realizing intelligence is not). I don’t wear contacts because I can’t. Like, my eyesight is so bad, companies have yet to make contacts that match my prescription in my glasses. When I did have contacts in my early years, I literally had (and still have) a code on my licence which tells people I can not wear contacts while driving because….I can’t see well enough to drive. I.E. like reading street signs, road signs and more. That stuff is sorta important ya know?! Therefore, stop asking me why don’t I just wear contacts. Also, whatever you do, do not, and I repeat do not, ask me why I just don’t get lasik. It’s offensive and makes me sad. Sniff sniff. I want to wear contacts or get lasik. Don’t ask stupid questions if you don’t want to hear a stupid answer. And I’ll leave it at that. Censorship and all ya’ know.

34 Replies to “Don’t Be A Poser- Stop Wearing Fake Glasses”

  1. I’ve had to wear glasses since first grade and hated it. I would get so irritated in high school with the girls who wore them only as a fashion statement!

    1. I hate that I can never find a pair that actually look amazing on me. My two daughters look amazing in them and they were these bold colors and I just can’t pull that off.

  2. As I’ve gotten older, my eye sight has gotten worse. Eye sight is definitely a gift to be cherished. Glasses are expensive, and not always a fun accessory, so I can totally understand your frustration with people who don’t need them wearing fake ones. I think you look beautiful in your picture, and I love those glasses!

  3. I think it’s kind of funny that people wear glasses as an accessory even if they don’t need them but I don’t think they are trying to mock anyone. I am lucky and don’t need to wear glasses yet but we will all be there one day and I doubt I will be able to wear contacts as my eyes are really sensitive. I had never thought about some of these things, like not being able to see anything in the shower; that really sucks.

  4. My son started wearing glasses when he was 7 and the first thing he said to me was “when can I get contacts?” Are you kidding me? 7 and already worried about people bothering him for wearing glasses. Its crazy! I had no idea it was even a fashion trend now but I’ll have to tell him to boost his confidence.

    1. My oldest took it instantly as a fashion trend. Which is why she wanted them. She has such a great out look on life I know she will always be her own. My youngest is just like me. We will make it our own but we won’t care either! Haha!!

  5. Before I had Lasik, I wore glasses all the time. My eyesight was terrible! It’s starting to fade again so I’ll probably have to pick up another pair soon :/ I remember how they’d fog up!

  6. I do not have to wear glasses yet. I never thought about how had it would be to shower. Without your glasses it would be impossible to read the bottles.

  7. I hate having to always wear prescription sunglasses! They are expensive and sometimes it would be nice to buy a couple of pairs of cute sunglasses to wear in the summer.

  8. I’ve never come across anyone that wears fake glasses, but I can see that being obnoxious! I’ve needed corrective lenses since elementary school although I tend to prefer my contacts most of the time.

  9. I’m so happy I don’t have to wear glasses any more. When I was a kid I had to. And the lenses were huge as well, and the frames not so cute either. But now that I’m an adult I don’t have to wear them, and also don’t blame my parents for how ugly they were because now I understand the value of money and how expensive everything is. But my husband has to were glasses and he chose some really nice back frames that I like.

  10. I’ve had to use glasses since highschool. I prefer it over contacts. I can’t for the life of me imagine putting something foreign on top of my eyeballs. LOL

  11. Glasses have really become a “thing” these past few years. To be honest, I would rather kids wear them for fun than kids make fun of other kids who actually need them.

  12. Haha.. I can totally relate to it. I used to hate wearing glasses when I first got them in the 7th grade. I learnt to like them eventually and now find my face weird without them. I do use contact lenses, but just once in a while. Cheers!!

  13. I have worn glasses or contact since I was 16. I am now in bi-focals – ugh!! Why would ANYONE want to wear them if they did not have to? That is a complete mystery to me.

  14. I wear contacts most days, but really really need correction to see. Best part, when I take a shower, I never know how dirty my tub is 😀 My husband has perfect vision, so I am not sure what his excuse is…

  15. Wear them as prescribed by your doctor, taking them off only when you develop eye pain, headaches, or dizziness. Once the dizziness passes, put your glasses on again. Some first-time wearers tend to develop dizziness and headaches because they move their eyes too much

  16. It usually doesnt bother me if people wear glasses as accessories…to each their own. If they want to wear things they dont need then i just shrug it off. I actually love my glasses and I definitely need them. So I just own them when I can.

  17. I 100% agree with the frustration of having to wear glasses. I have to wear them to drive and see at a distance. I have contacts but can not wear them all the time because my eyes get dry. I’ve heard all the comments too. Oh, glasses make someone look attractive. Oh, glasses are cute with that outfit. My response is always that my glasses are necessary to see and it is hard enough picking out a long term set with trendy frames without someone critiquing them because I need them to see!

  18. I need to wear eyeglasses not to look smart but because i need them. I dont like contact lenses coz it is more risk.
    Soon I will avail that Lasik treatment.

  19. LOL I kinda chuckled when I read this because I just had this conversation with a friend. She bought a pair to make herself look smarter for a job interview. I was like its not a fashion accessory.

  20. What I want to know is how it’s 2017 and we still don’t have an app to find our glasses yet?!?!?!??!! Get on it, app developers! Also, I’ve never actually run into someone wearing fake glasses, so reading this makes me want to run up to people and ask them if they can see without their glasses!

  21. Your post is hilarious! You are right, I don’t get why people want to wear fake glasses, I have been wearing glasses since I was a kid and now that my eyesight is getting worse with age I can barely see without my glasses!! Sometimes I misplace them and oh dear what a problem1

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